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JOKER



Member Since: 11 Sep 2008
Location: Sconnie Botland
Posts: 15876

Scotland 
Halloween Joke

A man is walking home alone late one foggy night...

when behind him he hears:


Bump...




BUMP...




BUMP...





Walking faster, he looks back and through the fog he makes out the image of an upright casket banging its way down the middle of the street toward him.




BUMP...





BUMP...





BUMP...






Terrified, the man begins to run toward his home, the casket bouncing quickly behind him





FASTER...





FASTER...






BUMP...







BUMP...




BUMP...





He runs up to his door, fumbles with his keys, opens the door, rushes in, slams and locks the door behind him.








However, the casket crashes through his door, with the lid of the casket clapping










clappity-BUMP...




clappity-BUMP...






clappity-BUMP...





on his heels, the terrified man runs.





Rushing upstairs to the bathroom, the man locks himself in. His heart is pounding; his head is reeling; his breath is coming in sobbing gasps.



With a loud CRASH the casket breaks down the door.









Bumping and clapping toward him.





The man screams and reaches for something, anything,
but all he can find is a bottle of cough syrup!









Desperate, he throws the cough syrup at the casket...
















and,







(hopefully you're ready for this!!!)
















The coffin stops .

Post #289950 31st Oct 2014 12:35pm
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duckworthparts
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Post #289955 31st Oct 2014 1:00pm
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Welshdragon



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Post #289974 31st Oct 2014 2:54pm
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KurtVerbose



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Switzerland 2007 Range Rover Vogue TDV8 Stornoway Grey

.... Laughing

Post #289975 31st Oct 2014 3:29pm
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paulmoran2



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Post #289978 31st Oct 2014 4:05pm
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Cam-Tech-Craig



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Post #289979 31st Oct 2014 4:08pm
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47p2



Member Since: 05 Oct 2010
Location: Gone Beyond, Subaru
Posts: 8048

Scotland 

This story happened a while ago in Dublin , and even though it sounds like an Alfred Hitchcock tale, it's true.

John Bradford, a Dublin University student, was on the side of the road hitchhiking on a very dark night and in the midst of a big storm.

The night was rolling on and no car went by. The storm was so strong he could hardly see a few feet ahead of him.

Suddenly, he saw a car slowly coming towards him and stopped.

John, desperate for shelter and without thinking about it, got into the car and closed the door.... Only to realize there was nobody behind the wheel and the engine wasn't on.

The car started moving slowly. John looked at the road ahead and saw a curve approaching. Scared, he started to pray, begging for his life. Then, just before the car reached the bend a hand appeared out of nowhere through the window, and turned the wheel. John, paralyzed with terror, watched as the hand came though the window, but never touched or harmed him.

Shortly thereafter, John saw the lights of a pub appear down the road, so, gathering strength he jumped out of the car and ran straight into it. Wet and out of breath, he rushed inside and started telling everybody about the horrible experience he had just had.

A silence enveloped the pub when everybody realized he was crying... And wasn't drunk.

Suddenly, the door opened, and two other people walked in from the dark and stormy night.

They, like John, were also soaked and out of breath. Looking around, and seeing John Bradford sobbing at the bar, one said to the other....

"Look Paddy....there's that idiot that got in the car while we were pushing it!!!!'

Post #289983 31st Oct 2014 4:15pm
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duckworthparts
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Post #289984 31st Oct 2014 4:16pm
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Full Fat Ray



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Rolling with laughter Rolling with laughter Rolling with laughter Thumbs Up 2006 (56 Reg) 4.4 V8 Vogue In Bonatti Grey (Gorgeous!!)

Post #290082 31st Oct 2014 11:36pm
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