Advertise on fullfatrr.com »

Home > Off Topic > Dr Mr Cameron....
Post Reply  Down to end
Page 1 of 1
Print this entire topic · 
nicedayforit



Member Since: 11 Jun 2011
Location: Beside the Solway
Posts: 3969

England 2004 Range Rover Vogue Td6 Giverny Green
Dr Mr Cameron....

Lifted from another Forum, Whistle

Dear Mr. Cameron,

I'm planning to move my family and extended family to Pakistan for my health and I would like to ask you to assist me with this.
We're planning to simply fly from Britain to Pakistan and we'll need your help to make a few arrangements....
We plan to skip all of the legal stuff like visas, passports, immigration quotas and laws.
I'm sure they handle those things in the same way you do here. So, would you mind telling your buddy, President Asif Ali Zardari, that I'm on my way over?

Please let him know that I will be expecting the following:

1. Free medical care for my entire family.
2. English-speaking government bureaucrats for all services I might need, whether I use
them or not.
3 All Pakistani Government forms must be printed in English.
4. I want my grandkids to be taught Urdu by English speaking (bi-lingual) teachers.
5. Tell their schools they need to include classes on British culture and history.
6. I want my grandkids to see the British flag on one of the flag poles at their school.
7. Please plan to feed my grandkids at school for both breakfast (Bacon & Eggs) and
lunch.
8. I will need a local Pakistani driver's license so I can get easy access to government
services.
9. I do plan to get a car and drive in Pakistan, but I don't plan to purchase car
insurance, and I probably won't make any special effort to learn local traffic laws.
10. In case one of the Pakistani police officers does not get the memo from President
Zardari to leave me alone, please be sure that every patrol car has at least one
English-speaking officer.
11. I plan to fly the British flag from my housetop, put British Flag decals on my car, and
have a gigantic celebration on December 25th. I do not want any complaints or
negative comments from the locals.
12. I would also like to have a nice job without paying any taxes, or have no labour or tax
laws enforced on any business I may start.
13. Please have President Zardari tell all of the Pakistani people to be extremely nice
and never say critical things about me or my family, or about the strain we might
place on their economy.
14. I want to receive free food stamps.
15. Naturally, I'll expect free rent subsidies.
16. I'll need income tax credits so that although I won't pay Pakistani taxes, I'll receive
money from the government.
17. Please arrange it so that the Pakistan Government pays me £4,500.00 to help me
buy a new car.
18. Oh yes, I almost forgot, please enrol me free into the Pakistan Social Security
program so that I'll get a monthly pension cheque in retirement.

I know this is an easy request because you already do all these things for all of his people who fly to Britain from Pakistan. I am sure that President Zardari won't mind returning the favour if you ask him nicely.

Post #234476 13th Jan 2014 11:09am
View user's profile Send private message View poster's gallery Reply with quote
minkius



Member Since: 11 Feb 2013
Location: Essex
Posts: 17

United Kingdom 2010 Range Rover Vogue TDV8 Stornoway Grey

Rolling with laughter Rolling with laughter

Post #234478 13th Jan 2014 11:45am
View user's profile Send private message View poster's gallery Reply with quote
RRV



Member Since: 05 Oct 2009
Location: Midlands
Posts: 648

United Kingdom 2015 Range Rover Vogue TDV6 Santorini Black

fecking joke innit! Rolling with laughter If you have nothing nice to say,say nothing at all.

Post #234487 13th Jan 2014 12:49pm
View user's profile Send private message View poster's gallery Reply with quote
Welshdragon



Member Since: 20 Jan 2012
Location: here and there...but not where I should be
Posts: 1899

Wales 2003 Range Rover Vogue 4.4 V8 Monte Carlo Blue

Rolling with laughter Rolling with laughter Rolling with laughter If it dont work.......burn it!

If the IId tool cant fix it.......burn the FF.

If the FF cant be fixed......buy a Land Cruiser!

If the LC cant be fixed..............................................BUY a horse !!

Post #234488 13th Jan 2014 12:54pm
View user's profile Send private message View poster's gallery Reply with quote
JAYBOY



Member Since: 17 Oct 2012
Location: South Wales
Posts: 2204

Wales 2017 Range Rover Autobiography 5.0 SC V8 Corris Grey

Takes the bl00dy pi55. Very Happy Very Happy 2020 Porsche Panamera Turbo Hybrid (V FAST)
2017 Range Rover Autobiography 5.0 V8
2018 JCW Mini Cooper
2018 Skoda VRS

Post #234500 13th Jan 2014 2:25pm
View user's profile Send private message View poster's gallery Reply with quote
RRUK
Site Supporter


Member Since: 08 Jun 2007
Location: UK
Posts: 6365

United Kingdom 2019 Range Rover Vogue SE SDV8 Santorini Black

This country..... Censored Discovery 4 HSE
1998 110 TUM HS FFR Hard Top XD WOLF
1982 Series 3 Hard Top

*Gone:L462 D5 HSE LUX, L663 Defender 110 HSE, Discovery 3 HSE, 2014MY Range Rover Sport 5.0 Supercharged AB Dynamic; L405 Exec Vogue SE 4.4, 5.0 Supercharged Autobiography, Defender TDCi XS CSW, Defender TD5 HT, Vogue SE TDV8, Vogue TD6, RRSport SC 4.2V8, Classic 3.9 Vogue Auto, Land Rover Series 3 SWB

Post #234502 13th Jan 2014 2:31pm
View user's profile Send private message View poster's gallery Reply with quote
andyboy



Member Since: 24 Aug 2010
Location: south wales
Posts: 540

Wales 2004 Range Rover Vogue Td6 Java Black

Fantastic Thumbs Up Rolling with laughter Rolling with laughter Rolling with laughter gone fishin'

Post #234551 13th Jan 2014 5:43pm
View user's profile Send private message View poster's gallery Reply with quote
RR2008HSE



Member Since: 06 Jan 2013
Location: British Columbia
Posts: 2932

Canada 2008 Range Rover HSE 4.4 V8 Java Black

.

Post #234676 14th Jan 2014 12:50am
View user's profile Send private message View poster's gallery Reply with quote
Robert



Member Since: 25 Oct 2011
Location: Perigueux
Posts: 2288

France 2007 Range Rover Vogue 4.4 V8 Zambezi Silver

I'll translate it in French and send it to this socialist fool that runs my country Thumbs Up

Post #234771 14th Jan 2014 12:27pm
View user's profile Send private message View poster's gallery Post Reply
Post Reply  Back to top
Page 1 of 1
All times are GMT

Jump to  
Previous Topic | Next Topic >
Posting Rules
You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum



Site Copyright © 2006-2024 Futuranet Ltd & Martin Lewis
fullfatrr.com RSS Feed - All Forums


Switch to Mobile site