My missus said shes leaving me because im a compulsive liar.


She'll miss my huge cock if she goes.

You sure about that .......


I hate predictive text. The other day I accidentally sent my girlfriend a text telling her I want to kick her puppy.


I like to think of bungee jumping as suicide for indecisive people


Note to self: remember never to play hide and seek with Chileans again - they take it VERY seriously ====================================

"Open Mike Night " sounded like a lot of fun until i found out i was going to an Autopsy

MICK wrote:

Note to self: remember never to play hide and seek with Chileans again - they take it VERY seriously

Best joke i've heard for a long time...