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iT LAD



Member Since: 08 Jul 2010
Location: Surrey
Posts: 1350
United Kingdom 
Bored

A few jokes as I'm in the city installing a couple of PC's and i'm bored out of my brians...



A Son asks his Dad the difference between theoretically & realistically. Dad says thats hard, but I have an idea. Ask Mum if she would sleep with Wayne Rooney for £1million. Mum says yes. Dad says now ask your sister if she would. Sister says yes. Dad says go ask your brother. He says yes. Well there you go son, thats your answer, theoretically we're sitting on £3million quid, but realistically we're living with 2 slags and a f Censored Censored king faggot!



Father and son in supermarket.
"Dad. what are these?"
"That's a 3 pack of condoms son for secondary school lads.
1 for friday night, 1 for saturday night and 1 for sunday night"
"What about the 6 pack dad?"
"Those are for university lads.
2 for friday night, 2 for saturday night and 2 for sunday night."
"Well dad. What about the 12 pack then?"
"Married men son. . . . 1 for january, 1 for february, 1 for march . . . .
Post #30596 4th Oct 2010 1:40pm
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JOKER



Member Since: 11 Sep 2008
Location: Sconnie Botland
Posts: 15876
Scotland 
Re: Bored

iT LAD wrote:
A few jokes as I'm in the city installing a couple of PC's and i'm bored out of my brians...



First of all what are Brians .......... Laughing Laughing

Secondly Jokes ............. Rolling with laughter Rolling with laughter Bow down ====================================

"Open Mike Night " sounded like a lot of fun until i found out i was going to an Autopsy

Last edited by JOKER on 5th Oct 2010 2:52pm. Edited 1 time in total
Post #30599 4th Oct 2010 1:45pm
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Vogue



Member Since: 31 Jan 2008
Location: on the hill
Posts: 3752
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Rolling with laughter Rolling with laughter Rolling with laughter fantastic
Post #30615 4th Oct 2010 4:09pm
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Full fat not diet



Member Since: 16 Nov 2008
Location: Herts
Posts: 1209
England 2004 Range Rover Vogue Td6 Zermatt Silver

Rolling with laughter Rolling with laughter Rolling with laughter

Brians Laughing
Post #30689 5th Oct 2010 6:53am
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iT LAD



Member Since: 08 Jul 2010
Location: Surrey
Posts: 1350
United Kingdom 
Re: Bored

MICK wrote:
iT LAD wrote:
A few jokes as I'm in the city installing a couple of PC's and i'm bored out of my brians...



First of all what are Brians .......... Laughing Laughing :



Have I told you how crap gogle Chorme is... The spelll cheek is awlful... Laughing Laughing
Post #30692 5th Oct 2010 7:08am
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JOKER



Member Since: 11 Sep 2008
Location: Sconnie Botland
Posts: 15876
Scotland 

Laughing Laughing Laughing ====================================

"Open Mike Night " sounded like a lot of fun until i found out i was going to an Autopsy

Post #30702 5th Oct 2010 7:32am
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iT LAD



Member Since: 08 Jul 2010
Location: Surrey
Posts: 1350
United Kingdom 

Well today I'm on Queens land installing a computer for a certain Lady married to a certain Sir ... Can't mention names... Security reasons.


I was greeted this morning with a bottle of Champagne at 10AM... Bit early for me so put it in my car...

I must say there are off there titties... But very nice people. I took the liberty of bringing my swimming shorts with me as I'm going to blag a swim in the pool later. Laughing Laughing Cheeky sod eh...

No doubt Gin and Tonics will be flowing later in the afternoon as usual.

I just want to say, that life in IT is very hard some days and you should be pity us for the long hours we have to work...

The chef guy is just making me some lunch now... Thumbs Up Thumbs Up Thumbs Up
Post #30771 5th Oct 2010 12:46pm
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JOKER



Member Since: 11 Sep 2008
Location: Sconnie Botland
Posts: 15876
Scotland 

Yeah i've seen Elton John's chef as well ........ Laughing mind if Michael Barrymore's there don't go in the pool .... Laughing Laughing ====================================

"Open Mike Night " sounded like a lot of fun until i found out i was going to an Autopsy

Post #30777 5th Oct 2010 12:58pm
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iT LAD



Member Since: 08 Jul 2010
Location: Surrey
Posts: 1350
United Kingdom 

I'll leave when the bumming starts... Shocked Laughing Laughing Laughing
Post #30779 5th Oct 2010 1:00pm
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Vogue



Member Since: 31 Jan 2008
Location: on the hill
Posts: 3752
United Kingdom 

Rolling with laughter Rolling with laughter Rolling with laughter
Post #30841 5th Oct 2010 8:10pm
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DMRR



Member Since: 14 Apr 2010
Location: Northamptonshire
Posts: 2027
South Africa 2009 Range Rover Westminster TDV8 Stornoway Grey

<alert> BAD JOKE </alert>

How do you make 10lbs of fat look good?

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...Stick a nipple on it... Rolling Eyes Land Rover Addict
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Previous
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2009 5.0V8SC Autobiography
2006 4.2V8SC Autobiography
2004 4.4V8 Vogue
Post #30842 5th Oct 2010 8:12pm
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delamo



Member Since: 17 Mar 2010
Location: Beaconsfield, Bucks
Posts: 1121
England 2007 Range Rover Vogue SE TDV8 Tonga Green

Laughing Laughing Laughing
Post #30844 5th Oct 2010 8:15pm
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