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Contraband



Member Since: 08 Nov 2010
Location: FIFE
Posts: 3697

Scotland 
The daily life of a car forum...

The cars involved have been changed to protect members identities .....

A newcomer says they are about to buy a BMW 320d but wonders if there are any alternatives they may not have considered. One person gives a useful answer based on experience. Seven people don�t. A further nine people make in-jokes an outsider simply wouldn�t understand. The newcomer doesn�t come back.

Someone boasts about beating another car, making unsubtle references to driving at 120mph on a public road. Seven people aren�t impressed. One person uses the word �****�. Someone gets banned, but not from driving. An argument breaks out.

A Nissan GT-R owner lists all the ways in which he considers that the vast engineering department at Nissan did not do an adequate job and the ways in which he, the owner of a building company in Rochdale, has remedied this.

Someone with a highly tuned car posts an unreadable graph taken from a rolling road session, along with an outlandish, Veyron-withering claim about how much power they have. A patently quite clever person delivers a short lecture about frictional losses. Three patently quite stupid people try to argue with him.

A person with a pseudonym that seemed funny six years ago draws attention to a car for sale. Five people pooh-pooh this car. One person says they �quite like it�.

Someone makes reference to their girlfriend for no real reason except to tell the world that they have a girlfriend.

A Nissan GT-R owner lists all the supercars they believe to be inferior to and slower than the Nissan GT-R.

Someone mentions Top Gear. Three other people say it�s an entertainment show and not a car show, as if they are the very first people ever to think of this.

Someone describes Rovers as rubbish. Someone else vehemently defends them.

Someone makes a cack-handed attempt to boast about how much they earn.

A Nissan GT-R owner declares that the Nissan GT-R is the best supercar money can buy. Eighteen people take issue with the use of the word �supercar�. An argument breaks out.
�Another person prods at their keyboard to tell the world in acronym form that they �laughed out loud��

A British person who lives abroad tries to make their new home country sound brilliant.

Someone refers to their car using an inexplicable capitalised abbreviation.

Someone starts a discussion about home electronics. Someone else makes an artless reference to the size of his own television as if actually and needlessly comparing penises. Someone smugly provides unrequested evidence of the speed of their home internet connection. A lone voice asks if we can get back to cars.

Someone makes a whimsical remark. Another person moves their mouse a couple of times, prods at their keyboard, moves their mouse again and devotes a total of 79 seconds of their time to tell the world in acronym form that they �laughed out loud�. They did not actually laugh out loud.

A man with a pair of breasts pictured under his username accuses someone else of being childish.

Someone refers to a car only by its obscure factory codename.

Someone asks an innocent question about wiper blades. A man whose auto-signature styles them as �no-nonsense� immediately crushes them with passive-aggressive disdain before their mum tells them to get off the computer and come down for their dinner.

A man whose username is a car he hasn�t owned for six years asks for advice about practical small cars for his wife, ideally costing around �12,000.
Someone immediately suggests a second-hand Boxster �like mine�.

A contributor confirms that yes, they are a girl. Seven male contributors make inept attempts to be charming.

Someone posts a photograph of a moderately famous actress and asks if she is hot or not. Five people immediately answer emphatically in the negative as if each of them is Brad Pitt. None of them is Brad Pitt. A lone voice asks if we can keep this to cars.

Ten pages later, the debate is still rolling. It is no longer safe to view at work.

Someone asks a question that, with a little effort, could be answered by a search engine. Three people leap to point this out. One of them is a total dick about it. An argument breaks out.

Someone accuses a magazine of unfair bias towards BMW/Porsche/Jaguar.

Someone makes a claim based on no information whatsoever. Two more people claim to have �heard that too�. Someone asks for proof. No proof is forthcoming. An argument breaks out.

The world keeps turning. People keep discussing cars on the internet.

_____________________________ Previously..
Vogue SE TD6
Defender 90 2.4
Defender 110 TD5
Vogue 3.5 EFI

Post #250895 27th Mar 2014 8:46am
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verydisco



Member Since: 10 Dec 2009
Location: UK/US
Posts: 2952

United Kingdom 2002 Range Rover Vogue 4.4 V8 Tangiers Orange

Great thing the FFRR forum is not a car forum but a gentlemen drivers' one then! Thumbs Up

Whistle l=Oo\________/oO=l l:OolΞΞΞΞΞΞΞloO:l

Current
RANGE ROVER Vogue 4.4L SDV8 - 2013 - Indus Silver, on Almond.
RANGE ROVER Vogue 4.4L V8 - 2002 - ex-2003 G4 Challenge Event Vehicle, Stage 3: Australia
RANGE ROVER HSE 4.4L V8 - 2004 - one-of-one Overfinch
RANGE ROVER P38a 4.0L V8 - 1999 - ex-2000 TReK Event Vehicle: South Africa

Previous:
RANGE ROVER Vogue 4.4L TDV8 - 2012 - RANGE ROVER 3.6L TDV8 x3 - RANGE ROVER Td6 x1 - RANGE ROVER Classic 3.5L V8 x1

Post #250898 27th Mar 2014 8:50am
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stan
Site Moderator


Member Since: 13 Jul 2010
Location: a moderate moderated moderator moderating moderately in moderation
Posts: 35336

United Kingdom 

those statements are so true Archie. Thumbs Up ... - .- -.




Y. O. L. O.
.

Post #250905 27th Mar 2014 9:10am
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Cam-Tech-Craig



Member Since: 03 Aug 2011
Location: Gloucestershire
Posts: 16294

England 2015 Range Rover SVAutobiography SDV8 Loire Blue

Laughing Shocked Thumbs Up

Post #250913 27th Mar 2014 9:26am
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KurtVerbose



Member Since: 08 Aug 2010
Location: Les Arses
Posts: 5848

Switzerland 2007 Range Rover Vogue TDV8 Stornoway Grey

Can we keep this to cars?

Oh - and my (not so) new country is fab. Smile

Post #250914 27th Mar 2014 9:40am
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shalz



Member Since: 28 Jan 2013
Location: where FFRRs roam free...!
Posts: 506

Kenya 2011 Range Rover Vogue TDV8 Santorini Black

lol ...

Kurt, in my country you get 90" tellies cheap, it's fab too! Thumbs Up MY11 Vogue 4.4 TDV8 - "African Queen"

Post #250921 27th Mar 2014 9:58am
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JAYBOY



Member Since: 17 Oct 2012
Location: South Wales
Posts: 2204

Wales 2017 Range Rover Autobiography 5.0 SC V8 Corris Grey

Laughing Laughing Laughing Off Topic 2020 Porsche Panamera Turbo Hybrid (V FAST)
2017 Range Rover Autobiography 5.0 V8
2018 JCW Mini Cooper
2018 Skoda VRS

Post #250922 27th Mar 2014 10:05am
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Robert



Member Since: 25 Oct 2011
Location: Perigueux
Posts: 2289

France 2007 Range Rover Vogue 4.4 V8 Zambezi Silver

Worst of all,

someone who seems to have a childhood problem with rubberballs, takes two I pad screens to explain how he thinks about certain forum members and their comments Twisted Evil

Post #250964 27th Mar 2014 1:50pm
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JOKER



Member Since: 11 Sep 2008
Location: Sconnie Botland
Posts: 15876

Scotland 
Re: The daily life of a car forum...

Contraband wrote:

A man with a pair of breasts pictured under his username accuses someone else of being childish.


I think you are just being childish .... Laughing Laughing ====================================

"Open Mike Night " sounded like a lot of fun until i found out i was going to an Autopsy

Post #250968 27th Mar 2014 2:02pm
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stan
Site Moderator


Member Since: 13 Jul 2010
Location: a moderate moderated moderator moderating moderately in moderation
Posts: 35336

United Kingdom 

LOL..........[79 seconds Embarassed ] ... - .- -.




Y. O. L. O.
.

Post #250971 27th Mar 2014 2:11pm
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shalz



Member Since: 28 Jan 2013
Location: where FFRRs roam free...!
Posts: 506

Kenya 2011 Range Rover Vogue TDV8 Santorini Black

ok enough, can we go back to discussing all things Mark III L322 related MY11 Vogue 4.4 TDV8 - "African Queen"

Post #250974 27th Mar 2014 2:46pm
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stan
Site Moderator


Member Since: 13 Jul 2010
Location: a moderate moderated moderator moderating moderately in moderation
Posts: 35336

United Kingdom 

curious to know who this is?

''Someone makes a cack-handed attempt to boast about how much they earn'' ... - .- -.




Y. O. L. O.
.

Post #250975 27th Mar 2014 2:49pm
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mzplcg



Member Since: 26 May 2010
Location: Warwickshire. England. The Commonwealth.
Posts: 4029

United Kingdom 2014 Range Rover Vogue SE SDV8 Corris Grey

Dunno, but not me. I'm skint all the time having one of those "Wife" thingies to finance Laughing

Post #250979 27th Mar 2014 3:08pm
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Robert



Member Since: 25 Oct 2011
Location: Perigueux
Posts: 2289

France 2007 Range Rover Vogue 4.4 V8 Zambezi Silver

^ that's because you're not in the EU..... Cool

Post #250983 27th Mar 2014 3:26pm
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Contraband



Member Since: 08 Nov 2010
Location: FIFE
Posts: 3697

Scotland 

Robert wrote:
Worst of all,

someone who seems to have a childhood problem with rubberballs, takes two I pad screens to explain how he thinks about certain forum members and their comments Twisted Evil


Big Cry

I just copied it from the Porsche forum...

Oh, sorry, are you just trying to start a fight??
Laughing Previously..
Vogue SE TD6
Defender 90 2.4
Defender 110 TD5
Vogue 3.5 EFI

Post #250984 27th Mar 2014 3:33pm
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